Discovering I was pregnant
For a few days, I had this strange feeling that something wasn’t quite right. There was an unusual taste in my mouth, and everything just felt a bit off. One day, a colleague overheard me mentioning the taste and jokingly said, "You could be pregnant." We laughed it off, but that night, her words kept playing on my mind, so I decided to take a test.
The test didn’t work! At that point, it was too late to get another one, so I decided to wait until the morning. The next morning, I took the test first thing. Sitting on my bed, with the test turned upside down, my mind was racing. What if I am pregnant? What would my mum say? What would my partner think? The minutes felt like hours, but when I finally turned the test over, I saw the result—and my life changed forever.
During my pregnancy
Pregnancy wasn’t without its challenges. It triggered a medical condition I’d never had before, and thankfully, I probably won’t experience it again. When I was 7 weeks pregnant, I fainted while on the tram into Manchester. Some might view this as a bad sign, but for me, it turned out to be a blessing, as it led to an early scan and the chance to see our little one’s heartbeat. It was the most incredible moment, knowing that our baby was real and safe.
However, there was a downside. The pregnancy had put a strain on my heart, causing me to faint several more times before our baby was born. While this is a rare occurrence, it left me with a lasting fear of trams—and I can’t bring myself to step on one again!
Despite the fainting, morning sickness, and the psoriasis that flared up, pregnancy was an amazing experience. Watching my body change, finding clothes to fit my growing bump, and getting used to the stretch marks was overwhelming, but every moment of it felt special, mainly because you know what will come at the end.
The gender reveal
At 16 weeks, we were so eager to find out the gender of our baby, we decided to book a private scan. Gender reveals weren’t as common back then, so it was just me, my partner, and my mum in the room. The sonographer, who was from New York (a coincidence, as we discovered I was pregnant soon after we returned from New York), showed us the baby’s movements on the screen and made sure everything was looking good. When we found out it was a girl, we were over the moon and ended up crying all the way home. That was when the shopping could finally begin!
My birth experience
Pregnancy seemed to fly by, and before we knew it, the pains started. I remember one Saturday night that I had planned to go to Housing Units the following day to pick out a coffee table for our new house. Nothing- absolutely nothing- was going to stop me. But when I woke up on the Sunday, there was a wet patch on the bed, and I realised that things might be changing sooner than I had planned.
Despite that, I was determined to go shopping. We got dressed and headed to my partner’s mum’s for breakfast before the trip. By then, the contractions had started, coming minutes apart and lasting around a minute each. Realising I couldn’t carry on, I decided to head home for a bath to ease the pain. Meanwhile, my partner was running around getting everything ready and called my mum to let her know things were happening!
When my mum arrived, she found me kneeling on the floor, leaning on my birthing ball, screaming in pain. Do you know what she did? She made me a plate of toast—the biggest plate of toast I’d ever seen! And thank goodness she did, because I really needed the energy.
A few hours later, when the contractions were coming thick and fast, we decided it was time to head to the hospital. At 2pm, we arrived, and after an examination, the midwife told me, “You’re only 2cm dilated.” They gave me some paracetamol and sent us home to rest, take another bath, and wait for things to progress.
Following their advice, I had the second bath of the day, which was honestly the best one yet. Then, I went downstairs, bounced on my birthing ball, had something to eat, and tried to relax. But by 7pm, the pain became unbearable. We went back to the hospital, where another examination revealed I was 4cm dilated. The midwife then said, “Let’s take you up to the labour ward. You won’t be leaving here without your baby.”
The next few hours were a blur of gas and air, pain relief, and contractions. Once I reached 10cm dilated, I was ready to push—but my waters still hadn’t broken. I pushed with all my might, and then pop!—they burst, everywhere. It was time. I kept pushing, but nothing seemed to happen, so I was taken for an emergency C-section.
Phoebe made her entrance into the world at 11:56pm on the 11th of September. She weighed 7lb 6oz, and the moment I laid eyes on her, I felt like my whole world had shifted. This tiny little person was going to rely on me forever, and I would get to experience the joy of being her mum.
Being a Mum
Being a mum is undeniably the hardest job in the world, but it’s also the most rewarding. Knowing that I’m the most important person in Phoebe’s life and the one she depends on when she needs it is something I hold dearly in my heart. I wouldn’t trade this role for anything in the world.